Categories: Insights and analysis

Oh no, not them: The worst candidates for the Satoshi Nakamoto role

Published by
Viktoriia Pushkina

A fun discussion started on Reddit: while previously people were guessing who Satoshi Nakamoto might really be, now they are discussing the worst possible options for this role.

“Who would disappoint you the most?” the thread’s author asks. buidlbee publishes the most remarkable answers.

By the way, the editorial version is the man whose name is really Satoshi Nakamoto. That would be ridiculous 🙂

#1 The Federal Reserve

This list also includes the Central Intelligence Agency (CIA), the National Security Agency (NSA), and the like. They are not very funny candidates. Instead, it is “the worst scenario,” Reddit users say. Of course, there is already talk that Bitcoin is not about “freedom” at all — it is just a myth. And if there was a governmental organization behind it… Yeah, that would be a disappointment.

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#2 Oshisat Motonaka

Or Otomakan Ihsotas 🙂 You can play with the name endlessly here. But then again, Satoshi had something to fall back on when they came up with his nickname, didn’t they?

By the way, our editorial version turned out to be not so unique: people on Reddit also wrote that they would have been disappointed if they had found out that Satoshi Nakamoto was their real name. What’s more: 400+ people would have been disappointed by it.

#3 You

No offense, guys! But, as user @goldyluckinblokchain wrote, “I would hate it if it turned out to be me and my amnesia erased all my memories.”

Well, if it had been me, I wouldn’t have been disappointed. It’s much funnier for me to think that Satoshi Nakamoto might be reading this article right now and grinning at this point 🙂

#4 Any human being at all

Reddit user @Settowin is basically not too happy about any candidate for the Satoshi role. Unless, of course, it’s a lizard or an artichoke, or… maybe you have options too? I’m betting on mice; they sure know something!

#5 Cardi B

Many people actually disagreed that it would be disappointing. “No, this would be great. Good for her,” wrote @UncleSlippyFist. And @Gary_FucKing adds that he would love it because “I feel like crypto bros would be so mad.”

The same can be said about candidates like Amber Heard, Kim Kardashian, John Cena, or Mr.Bean — they were also mentioned in the thread.

#6 Elon Musk

Of course, writing this article without mentioning Elon Musk is impossible. “Redditors and hating Musk, name a more iconic duo,” writes a user on the service who has already deleted their account (I wonder why?).

And @samzi87 adds, “that would also make him the greatest troll ever.” Troll or no troll, many quite seriously agree that with certain resources, Elon could very well be the creator of Bitcoin.

#7 Hal Finney

We also have Craig Wright or Dorian Nakamoto, and all other names that have come up more than once when discussing who Satoshi is. After all, if it was so obvious, everything immediately becomes kind of boring, doesn’t it?

Write in the comments who would disappoint you the most. Maybe the guy or girl who did the worst in your class? That’s precisely what the creator of the original Reddit thread thinks. As for me, I’m not likely to be disappointed by that turn of events, but I absolutely would be surprised 🙂

Viktoriia Pushkina

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